Basking in self-pity

Today, the song “Great I am” was playing in my head while I was working. The chorus goes:

“Hallelujah, Holy Holy …God almighty, Great I am …Who is worthy …None beside Thee …God Almighty …Great I Am.”

It began as a quiet whisper in the corner of my heart and then gradually increased in volume until I was practically shouting the words of the song at the top of my lungs: “NONE BESIDE THEE…GOD ALMIGHTY…GREAT I AM”

Thankfully, I was alone in the office during lunch break (but God) had to listen to my slightly (okay majorly) off-key voice.

Funny thing is, I’ve felt a bit disappointed lately. Disappointment feels like a heavy rock sinking to the bottom of my spirit. I’ve felt disappointed in many situations – things that happen at work, out of my control. Or the lack inspiration when working on my blog moments, or when one of my children fail to do something important. Right now, I feel disappointment each month since my husband and I have married last year month with something that just isn’t happening yet. If you are a woman, you will know what I mean.

Then yesterday, I forced myself to read one of my daily devotions, not thinking that anything could lift my spirits. So I was going through my iPhone trying to decided which devotion to choose from when I got to my Mars Hill app, and there it was “Look up” by Pastor Tim Smith . LOOK UP!

“Look Up” a daily devotion by Pastor Tim Smith

“I will give thanks to the LORD  with my whole heart; I will recount all of your wonderful deeds.” Psalm 9:1

 

God was using others and technology again, to grab my attention. In short, the post was about how we tend to forget to look around and see what God has done. All the great things, all the changes, all the miracles instead of all the bad things you think are happening in your life.

Do you end up thinking that there is something or someone you NEED (besides Jesus),so that your life would be complete? If you could just have that job at that pay, life would be so much better. If God would just open your womb, the emptiness would finally be gone. If He would just heal your broken, cold marriage, your heart would be joyful. If He would just fulfill that lifelong dream, you would be content.

There are times that with all of our prayers He seems to answer “no” or at least “not now”. It is here, where our desires crosses His will. That we have to trust the Father who knows best and that every gift comes from Him. Every time, in His time, the gift is good and perfect.

I have seen God’s perfect gifts in my life as I have waited on Him. Waited on Him to heal my pain of a previous broken marriage. Waited on Him to help me find my birth family. Waited on Him to draw my kids to Himself, Waited on Him for the loving husband that I now have… I see my history with Him and I’m going to choose to keep on waiting for His good and perfect gifts.

I’m glad that God caught my attention yesterday evening and that instead of basking in self-pity, today I am singing His praise!

 

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