Paradox by Lynn Grubb

As an adoptee I find it hard to explain exactly how I feel about adoption. Even though I think adoption is necessary in our disposable world…and I understand the sentiment of couples having difficulties conceiving, I still struggle with my own situation. I usually answer people’s questions on adoption with “yes, I agree that there are too many unwanted children out there, but….” And then I shut down.
I have a semi happy ending, being found a few years ago and since have reunited with my birth family, yet, although one wound closed…it seemed like another one opened.(more on that later)
Anyway, I still count myself blessed, but still at a loss of words on the matter, until I found a voice over at The lost daughters website.

I just wanted to share this with you all and suggest you visit their wonderful website.

Adoption is

a concept, a belief and an action
A lack of choice and being chosen
A legal solution to a spiritual problem
A spiritual solution to a legal problem
A loving choice and a thrusting upon
A nurturing touch yet a stealing away

it saved me; yet damaged me
Provided for me, yet took away from me
Blessed me yet cursed me
Gave me a name and took a name
It creates a chance for love to grow and a door for misunderstanding
It creates a family out of strangers and strangers out of family
It inspires and teaches and it wounds and damages

Adoption is

My friend and my enemy
A thorn in my side and my shining light
A rainbow and a gravestone
Acceptance and rejection
Truth and lies
Known and unknown
Love and hatred
a casting away and returning

Adoption is

Not my friend nor my enemy
Not the excuse or the cause
Not perfect or evil
Not the reason or the scapegoat
Not who I am or who I am not
Everything and nothing

(copyright Lynn Grubb; may reproduce with permission)

When I say…”I am a Christian”

When I say…”I am a Christian” 
I’m not shouting “I am saved” 
I’m whispering “I get lost!” 
“That is why I chose this way.”

When I say…”I am a Christian” 
I don’t speak of this with pride. 
I’m confessing that I stumble 
and need someone to be my guide.

When I say…”I am a Christian” 
I’m not trying to be strong. 
I’m professing that I’m weak 
and pray for strength to carry on.

When I say…”I am a Christian” 
I’m not bragging of success. 
I’m admitting I have failed 
and cannot ever pay the debt.

When I say…”I am a Christian” 
I’m not claiming to be perfect, 
my flaws are too visible 
but God believes I’m worth it.

When I say…”I am a Christian” 
I still feel the sting of pain 
I have my share of heartaches 
which is why I seek His name.

When I say…”I am a Christian” 
I do not wish to judge. 
I have no authority. 
I only know I’m loved.

– Author Carol Wimmer – Copyright 1988

Related Posts Plugin for WordPress, Blogger...